Perfection. In the wrong hands, yielded with misunderstanding, it is a disease. It erodes the spirit, reducing it to measures that can never be met with satisfaction. It is fatal to some who believe it is attainable.

There is an alarming trend we are seeing in our adolescents. It is a profile of perfection. These young people are involved, have loving homes, and perfect grades. To most who encounter them, they see a child who appears to have it all put together. Then one day, the armor cracks and the suffering is exposed. He or she can’t stand the world they have been given and decides it is better if they never existed at all.

There is a mentality thriving in our young people that has convinced them that it is better to be gone than for the world to suffer them with their imperfections. They are so accustomed to rooting out their failures and shortcomings that they can barely stand to see their reflection in the mirror. Breathing becomes a chore. They are either reminded they are not enough, or when things do go well, the shame they feel from believing they are undeserving is so invasive that they cannot accept their accomplishments.

To hide from failures or any positive attention they feel is unwarranted, they choose invisibility. They hide in plain sight. They smile. They do as they are told. They earn the grades they are supposed to earn. They are quiet but know how to engage long enough to retreat at the first opportunity they receive. They are seen with the veil of contrived happiness, there yet gone.

For my colleagues who fight day in and day out to give students what they need, I have witnessed your growing ability to see the hidden with amazing vigilance. Time and time again, I have seen a teacher follow their gut and pursue help for a child who doesn’t know how to seek it out themselves. A hunch, a detection of subtle changes or nuances, a bending ear at the right time is part of the nourishment needed if we ever hope to mend the growing wounds of our youth. Your work as an educator may go unnoticed to the world around you, but to these children and families, you are not just teaching; you are saving lives.

For those who walk around hiding behind veils, let the light hit your face and your heart feel joy. You deserve another chapter. You were not made to be perfect. In fact, the perfection you crave will only lead you to feel more incomplete. Resist the need to fix yourself and lean into the ability to accept yourself. Take your flaws, dust them off, and honor their purpose and the gift of humanity they offer. You are perfectly imperfect. You are loved and worthy of receiving it. Be brave. Be seen. Be you.